Was thinking about it,

All my life I've settled for the alternative, taking the easy way out, accepting my fate. When Art wasn't offered as an O'Level subject in my secondary school (there were only 3 of us who wanted to do it), I just accepted the fact. In Polytechnic, the 3D Animation class I wanted to do was so packed full, I didn't bother to try bidding for it. In the end they opened more classes to accommodate the overwhelming response. There was the School of Film and Media Studies as well,which many thought that I should be doing rather than my IT Diploma. They seemed to have far more fabulous modules, but the hassle of switching a course and starting all over again turned me off. When job offers came my way from friends, no interviews required, I took it up, simply to escape the painful process job-hunting and being given a rejection.

This horrible attitude ought to change. I have dreams, I have aspirations, but my actions so far didn't equate that I wanted them BADLY ENOUGH.

And now, I'm 24, a miserable looking resume filled with experience that wouldn't even contribute to what I want to do. Sure, I can type bloody fast and know how to answer bloody phone calls. But any screwup can do that as well. How to be a bloody freelance graphic designer or illustrator? Oh can you believe that I can't even use Photoshop, the most widely-used format in the industry? That I have chose to use Fireworks instead, because it was easier? I can't even use FLASH! 14 year olds can use Photoshop and Flash, they teach it in school these days, but fucking hell I'm ten years older than them and lack the fucking patience. I spent so much time fiddling around with Photoshop yesterday that I wanted to cry. Fucking steep learning curve.

This is one painful lesson to learn, and I learnt it the hard way. I'm planning to go back to school. I may only get that fecking degree only when I'm 27, but who really cares? But this time around, I'm just going to do something that I like, no matter what it takes.