A client was over at our office and was asking us whether we are able to handle projects that will require the use of Flash Lite. I returned him a blank look. Embarrasing, coz 1) I didn't know what it was and 2) the image of a similar sounding device was flashing in my mind.
I need a holiday. A sexy holiday.
Showing posts with label This is for real. Show all posts
Showing posts with label This is for real. Show all posts
Monday, June 22, 2009
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Brand and Product Names that may not do too well with Singaporeans and Malaysians
Building up your brand or product with a memorable and striking name is essential, but a name which works well in your country or region may be taken out of context in another part of the world. The brand name Siemens surely invokes sniggles among teenagers of the English speaking world.
Here are36 which I could think of at the moment, in the part of the world I live in. Do let me know if you know of any other!
1)
Name of Product: Softlan
What is it actually selling: Fabric Softener
What it sounds to us: Lan, in the Chinese dialect Hokkien, is the Penis. And having a Soft-lan, in certain situations, is definitely not a good thing for both parties.
2)
Name of Product: DBI-Sala
What is it actually selling: Fall Protection Equipment in the Construction Industry, selling Body Harness, etc.
What it sounds to us: The Malay word Salah means wrong, and when you're talking about body harness and how it's supposed to save your life in case you fall, you so do not like it to go wrong. DBI-Sala products probably don't do so well in the Construction Industries of Malaysia and Indonesia.
3)
Name of Service: Pukii
What is it actually: A savings plan, catered for children, created by The Shanghai Commerical and Savings Bank. Also, the little piggy mascot's name.
What it sounds to us: Puki, in the Malay Language, is the cheebye, which is, in clinical terms, the Vagina. With TVCs such as these, you'll have the children of China singing the jingles which goes puki-puki-puki, kawaii!, while in another part of the world, sputtering the same word could earn the Malaysian/Singaporean kid a smack across the face from their parents.
Anyway, Check out the Puki City as well.
4)
Name of Company: KOTEH Auto Sales
What is it actually: A Canadian Car Sales Company
What it sounds like to us: KOTEH is dick in Tamil. Indians in Canada must have giggled.
5)
Picture Credit: Becca Sutton's Flickr
Name of Company: Wanko
What it is actually:A clothing line of Veeko International Holding Limited, Hong Kong. (Source). Executive wear, catered for women in their 30s.
What it sounds like to us: People in English speaking worlds would tell you: to wank is to masturbate, and though it's an activity people engage themselves in once in a while, no one enjoys being called a wanker. Much less tell people that you work in a place called Wanko.
Wanko has opened several branches in the shopping malls of Singapore, so you'll have people like my poor chinese-educated mother enjoying the smart executive clothes, totally clueless. And no, I can't explain it to her. I don't know how to say " to masturbate" in Mandarin.
6)
Name of Company: Pondan
What it is actually:Manufacturers of Baking Ingredients from Indonesia. Here's their website.
What it sounds like to us: Pondans are how the Malays call transvestites, and sometimes, effeminate men. Nama Salah lah, brudder.
Here are
1)
Name of Product: Softlan
What is it actually selling: Fabric Softener
What it sounds to us: Lan, in the Chinese dialect Hokkien, is the Penis. And having a Soft-lan, in certain situations, is definitely not a good thing for both parties.
2)
Name of Product: DBI-Sala
What is it actually selling: Fall Protection Equipment in the Construction Industry, selling Body Harness, etc.
What it sounds to us: The Malay word Salah means wrong, and when you're talking about body harness and how it's supposed to save your life in case you fall, you so do not like it to go wrong. DBI-Sala products probably don't do so well in the Construction Industries of Malaysia and Indonesia.
3)
Name of Service: Pukii
What is it actually: A savings plan, catered for children, created by The Shanghai Commerical and Savings Bank. Also, the little piggy mascot's name.
What it sounds to us: Puki, in the Malay Language, is the cheebye, which is, in clinical terms, the Vagina. With TVCs such as these, you'll have the children of China singing the jingles which goes puki-puki-puki, kawaii!, while in another part of the world, sputtering the same word could earn the Malaysian/Singaporean kid a smack across the face from their parents.
Anyway, Check out the Puki City as well.
4)
Name of Company: KOTEH Auto Sales
What is it actually: A Canadian Car Sales Company
What it sounds like to us: KOTEH is dick in Tamil. Indians in Canada must have giggled.
5)
Name of Company: Wanko
What it is actually:A clothing line of Veeko International Holding Limited, Hong Kong. (Source). Executive wear, catered for women in their 30s.
What it sounds like to us: People in English speaking worlds would tell you: to wank is to masturbate, and though it's an activity people engage themselves in once in a while, no one enjoys being called a wanker. Much less tell people that you work in a place called Wanko.
Wanko has opened several branches in the shopping malls of Singapore, so you'll have people like my poor chinese-educated mother enjoying the smart executive clothes, totally clueless. And no, I can't explain it to her. I don't know how to say " to masturbate" in Mandarin.
6)
Name of Company: Pondan
What it is actually:Manufacturers of Baking Ingredients from Indonesia. Here's their website.
What it sounds like to us: Pondans are how the Malays call transvestites, and sometimes, effeminate men. Nama Salah lah, brudder.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Dear stupid Singaporeans, NOBODY is telling you to wash the dishes lah!
Seriously, guys. Seriously. WTF!
Picture Credit: SoShiok.Com
Apparently our Prime Minister, in one of his points in his recent National Day Speech 2008, gave the suggestion that we help clear our trays after we finished our food, perhaps at Food Courts and Fast Food Restaurants. Though I doubt the man has ever seen the situation of our Food Courts, being one of the more privileged people in this world (tagged with a high price tag as well), at least he brought this to our attention.
Shortly after comes the rebuttals from the citizens, who needs to share their two cents worth about the following issue on the Internet. Sources: Soshiok.com , SgComplainHub , Tomorrow.sg
Says one: "We shouldn't generalize about returning tray equates social graciousness. Many of these foodcourt workers are old men and women and they need jobs."
Says another: "When I was in the army I also washed my plates, so I need to do this in food court too?"
Says, the most imbecilic one from all: "We don't return our plates it's because FREEDOM allows us to do that and there is NO LAW that indicate that we must return our plates."
This leads me to ask the following questions: Am I actually living alongside and surrounded by fecking morons such as them? Did they actually studied in the same schools as I did in this country?!
I mean, come on lah! First of all, you morons are not getting the message. Don't know how to read between the lines, har? The Prime Minister just wants to tell you to think for the next person who's going to be using the Food Court table. That is called having SOCIAL CONSCIOUSNESS! Never mind whether he/she is a Singaporean/PR/WP/SP Holder. Basic Courtesy! He is not telling you to put on your gloves and whip out your scrubs to do some dish-washing!
And yes, don't be stupid, those aunties/uncles would not lose their jobs just because you help them with the table-clearing portion of their job scope. I'm sure if this practice of self-service table-clearing continues, I'm sure their employers would busy them with other duties that goes on "backstage" in this Food Court Orchestra: which is sure to include throwing the stuff into dishwashers.
National Service teaches you to be independent. Forces you to do stuff which your mother or maid has been doing for you. Oh come on, I've never been enlisted into my army, but haven't we been taught the same things since childhood? Can't you apply the skills and knowledge you've learnt? In our school canteens in Primary or Secondary Schools, we had big buckets infront of canteen stalls, where we can put our plates and bowls and what have yous back. You're just doing the same thing if you're returning the trays.
Even in the Polytechnic where the canteens we had worked like Foodcourts, cleaners were hired to push their trolleys around to collect the crockery and give the tables a quick wipe-down. It so happens that around 15,000 of us were distributed in the 4 canteens around the school, so you can imagine the horrible lunchtime crowd and the difficulty of getting any available tables. And those were the days you would have found me having no qualms clearing the mess left by the previous patrons, and wiping down the table with tissue paper, just so that me and my classmates could have a table to have lunch on.
Even till this day I still don't mind clearing the tables just so I could have a table with my friends or colleagues: at coffee shops, fast food restaurants, food court. But of course I draw the line when it comes to places where I pay a hefty 10% service-charge. And these are actions coming from someone who hates doing housework!
I was at a Thailand University when I was 18, for an Asian debating competition (Not to debate, really, I'm a lousy debater), so expect debaters from everywhere in Asia. We had our meals in their canteens which served really horrible food. The 'proud' Singapore contingent did what we usually do back at home: left our cockery on the table. I remembered that one of the ladies, possibly from the organizing committee, approached us and told us to clear the plates ourselves, pointing to the stations we could returned it at. These people must have been thinking: "These first-world country snobs, snortsnort."
Lastly: Mr SgComplainHub, do you really need the law to tell you what to do? PREASE LAH, use your brain lah! "We don't return our plates it's because FREEDOM allows us to do that and there is NO LAW that indicate that we must return our plates." Yeah seriously, I think you belong to the same league of people who leave the junk at ZoukOut parties or those big countdown parties. Or drop your flyers infront of mailboxes. Boh Zheng Hu mah! But thanks for the suggestion! Perhaps we really do need a law to force morons like yourself into social-conscious creatures!
Returning the tray is just like holding the door for someone. Or giving up the MRT seat to someone else that needs it. Or holding the lift for the neighbor who's ushering his/her noisy kids to school. Or pressing the lift buttons. Tree-hugging hippie it may sound, but it's simple acts like that make this place a better place to live in.
Mr Lee is so right. "It's going to take time to change the mindset". Unfortunately you are right, Mr Lee.
Picture Credit: SoShiok.ComApparently our Prime Minister, in one of his points in his recent National Day Speech 2008, gave the suggestion that we help clear our trays after we finished our food, perhaps at Food Courts and Fast Food Restaurants. Though I doubt the man has ever seen the situation of our Food Courts, being one of the more privileged people in this world (tagged with a high price tag as well), at least he brought this to our attention.
Shortly after comes the rebuttals from the citizens, who needs to share their two cents worth about the following issue on the Internet. Sources: Soshiok.com , SgComplainHub , Tomorrow.sg
Says one: "We shouldn't generalize about returning tray equates social graciousness. Many of these foodcourt workers are old men and women and they need jobs."
Says another: "When I was in the army I also washed my plates, so I need to do this in food court too?"
Says, the most imbecilic one from all: "We don't return our plates it's because FREEDOM allows us to do that and there is NO LAW that indicate that we must return our plates."
This leads me to ask the following questions: Am I actually living alongside and surrounded by fecking morons such as them? Did they actually studied in the same schools as I did in this country?!
I mean, come on lah! First of all, you morons are not getting the message. Don't know how to read between the lines, har? The Prime Minister just wants to tell you to think for the next person who's going to be using the Food Court table. That is called having SOCIAL CONSCIOUSNESS! Never mind whether he/she is a Singaporean/PR/WP/SP Holder. Basic Courtesy! He is not telling you to put on your gloves and whip out your scrubs to do some dish-washing!
And yes, don't be stupid, those aunties/uncles would not lose their jobs just because you help them with the table-clearing portion of their job scope. I'm sure if this practice of self-service table-clearing continues, I'm sure their employers would busy them with other duties that goes on "backstage" in this Food Court Orchestra: which is sure to include throwing the stuff into dishwashers.
National Service teaches you to be independent. Forces you to do stuff which your mother or maid has been doing for you. Oh come on, I've never been enlisted into my army, but haven't we been taught the same things since childhood? Can't you apply the skills and knowledge you've learnt? In our school canteens in Primary or Secondary Schools, we had big buckets infront of canteen stalls, where we can put our plates and bowls and what have yous back. You're just doing the same thing if you're returning the trays.
Even in the Polytechnic where the canteens we had worked like Foodcourts, cleaners were hired to push their trolleys around to collect the crockery and give the tables a quick wipe-down. It so happens that around 15,000 of us were distributed in the 4 canteens around the school, so you can imagine the horrible lunchtime crowd and the difficulty of getting any available tables. And those were the days you would have found me having no qualms clearing the mess left by the previous patrons, and wiping down the table with tissue paper, just so that me and my classmates could have a table to have lunch on.
Even till this day I still don't mind clearing the tables just so I could have a table with my friends or colleagues: at coffee shops, fast food restaurants, food court. But of course I draw the line when it comes to places where I pay a hefty 10% service-charge. And these are actions coming from someone who hates doing housework!
I was at a Thailand University when I was 18, for an Asian debating competition (Not to debate, really, I'm a lousy debater), so expect debaters from everywhere in Asia. We had our meals in their canteens which served really horrible food. The 'proud' Singapore contingent did what we usually do back at home: left our cockery on the table. I remembered that one of the ladies, possibly from the organizing committee, approached us and told us to clear the plates ourselves, pointing to the stations we could returned it at. These people must have been thinking: "These first-world country snobs, snortsnort."
Lastly: Mr SgComplainHub, do you really need the law to tell you what to do? PREASE LAH, use your brain lah! "We don't return our plates it's because FREEDOM allows us to do that and there is NO LAW that indicate that we must return our plates." Yeah seriously, I think you belong to the same league of people who leave the junk at ZoukOut parties or those big countdown parties. Or drop your flyers infront of mailboxes. Boh Zheng Hu mah! But thanks for the suggestion! Perhaps we really do need a law to force morons like yourself into social-conscious creatures!
Returning the tray is just like holding the door for someone. Or giving up the MRT seat to someone else that needs it. Or holding the lift for the neighbor who's ushering his/her noisy kids to school. Or pressing the lift buttons. Tree-hugging hippie it may sound, but it's simple acts like that make this place a better place to live in.
Mr Lee is so right. "It's going to take time to change the mindset". Unfortunately you are right, Mr Lee.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
OMGWTF
Yes. Near Sim Lim Square, at around 6:40 a.m. The Bus 170 bus ride I was on passed by the not-too-gorgeous scene, in the following sequence:
First, Police Car, checked.
Second, the Policemen, putting barriers around, checked.
Third, a random brown slipper on the road, checked.
Fourth, white-cloth covering a bent-over body, with a trail of blood that lead to, in my assumption, said body's head, checked.
Fifth, a red sports car, with it's windscreen shattered on the left side, checked.
Sixth, a bespectacled Chinese Ah Beng, standing around accident scene, looking pretty calm, erm...
It was only after a few seconds after being "ridden-past" the scene that it occurred to me that I just saw a dead guy. Frightening, for somebody who was once knocked down by a car.
*whispers like Peter Griffin* It could have been meee!.. and I don't really want to know whassup under that white-sheet. Poor guy. Probably on the way to work, you know.
Monday, July 21, 2008
The perils of Facebook.
Joyce "Panaj" Arriola, want to keep a secret also dunnoe how to do it properly, har? It's too bad that Harlie has set her settings for her Funwall's News Feed to her friends!
I don't care. You owe me a present now.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
This is for real: Turbanizer.com!
Yes, now you can find out how you look like with a Turban, with TURBANIZER! You just have to upload a photo of yourself and choose from an array of turbans available!Apparently there's a reason for Turbanizer.com
Why we made the Turbanizer
Racism is driven by being afraid of the unknown. People that do not wear a turban need to connect with the turban to understand it. Turbanizer.com helps by allowing anyone in the world to visualize themselves in a turban. If someone insults your turban, just TURBANIZE THEM!
Racism is driven by being afraid of the unknown. People that do not wear a turban need to connect with the turban to understand it. Turbanizer.com helps by allowing anyone in the world to visualize themselves in a turban. If someone insults your turban, just TURBANIZE THEM!
-Excerpt from Why we made the Turbanizer
Ah, so the men with the Paghs are sick of the Turban jokes, and they built this application to laugh at themselves. That's a nice touch :P
This is how a 5-year old me look like in a Punjabi-Styled Black Turban. Those who are very fond of "Bhai What Colour" jokes is going to have a riot with this application.
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